Following up

// February 4th, 2009 // family

I meant to write this last night but was just not feeling good and went to bed early. I felt it was important that I do it and so I’m doing it right now.

My little rant yesterday resulted in some comments that were awesomely supportive, but also a bit vindictive and I realized that was all my fault. As funny as I found the “poke their eye out” idea (made me laugh Josie!), I knew that I somehow conveyed a lot of anger there and that this person hurt us really bad.

I truly believe they didn’t even realize fully that they did it, and didn’t do it intentionally to hurt anyone. I know that’s not who they are. Jina knows it too.

I just realize now that I wrote it in a way that attacked that person, and really I was trying to mostly address the idea of people doing it in general.

And the anger in that post was a result of my own issues with this, especially when it came to my upbringing and the fact that people didn’t approve of us being home schooled. There is a lot of that stuff that still affects things to this day and thus when things like this happens to someone I love, it just sets me off.

Anyways, I just apologize in general, because I probably wrote it too soon and should have waited a day or two when things settled down.  I really didn’t expect that kind of response and that’s when I realized I probably shouldn’t have written it the way I did.

I find that most of life is like that…if you just wait a day for the dust to settle, you get a better picture of how you truly feel about whatever happened and what might be the best way to go about addressing it.

8 Responses to “Following up”

  1. D.L. White says:
    February 4, 2009 at 9:34 am

    Good lesson learned. I have my own policy that I have to wait at least 24 hours before posting something on my blog (especially something that leans more towards a rant). If for no other reason than to force myself to re-read it and make sure the writing is up to snuff. There have been several times where I’ve written a rant, and then the next day deleted the whole thing, because I’d calmed down and/or gotten some perspective on the situation since the initial rant. In fact, I’d started to comment yesterday on your rant, and then thought twice about what I was saying and deleted it! ha ha :P

    I’ve gotten a lot of unsolicited “lectures” from people about various things in my life, and they all stung pretty bad… (I don’t even have kids yet, and I’ve gotten “kid” lectures. Sheesh.) The motivations of the people ranged from genuine desire to give advice and help out because they care about me (even though they were horribly misguided) to strangers just wanting to feel judgmental and superior. Bottom line is, people need to think before they open their mouth. Words, when spoken, can never be taken back. And I guess that goes for blog posts too. ;)

    Btw – I think you and Jina are AWESOME parents… keep up the good work!

  2. Scotty Dub says:
    February 4, 2009 at 11:29 am

    As they say hindsight is always 20/20. On the other hand, a blog is a good place to vent. It’s your space, say what you want.

    In the end judging is a sin most of suffer from all too regularly, so if your rant helps point that out, then good came from it.

  3. Josie says:
    February 4, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    I still think someone needs a good eye poke.

  4. Mike says:
    February 4, 2009 at 2:03 pm

    Josie, maybe you can poke my eye? :)

  5. Cap'n Schwartz says:
    February 4, 2009 at 3:59 pm

    Mike, you are too nice bud…. as commander of your ship you gotta call it how you see fit and not apologize for it. You didnt call anyone out on it, point out names, post signs in their yard, hand out flyers, post on a billboard or respond rudely to unwarranted opinions how to manage your life.

    Its really important to know “The ones that need love the most, are always the hardest ones to love”and an apology is certainly a great way to clear the air and advise others you care about them, however the Cap’n says it’s also ok let em know how you feel and if you wanted their opinion on how to manage your life, wife and raise your daughter you WOULD BEAT IT OUT OF THEM… oh wait, different instance, I just mean it doesn’t have to be in a bad way to let them know you appreciate their insight on many things but not on certain issues and Mrs J. working partime isn’t one of them, but thanks anyway. You may be the nicest guy I know, honestly, but apologizing for something that might make everyone tick, thinks its an apology that was not needed.

    Thats how the Capn sees it from his grassy green side of the hill…

  6. nicky says:
    February 4, 2009 at 4:56 pm

    one word comes to mind- grace.

  7. Cap'n Schwartz says:
    February 4, 2009 at 5:44 pm

    Yeah shes a great grandma!

  8. Josie says:
    February 5, 2009 at 3:02 pm

    Alright, alright. Nicky has me at grace. :P Violence will be put to a rest. lol

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